It’s 15 degrees outside and I am sitting in my garden with my morning coffee listening to the cacophony of all the different birds around me. Seagulls, magpies, robins, pigeons, crows and other birds I don’t yet recognise.
I’m quite open about my SAD that creeps up on me each year (last winter was the most challenging and I experienced it several times). It can be so debilitating especially since I experienced real depression for years and so to have these yearly reminders is hard to bear. This autumn though, I am determined to thrive and not suffer.
I am NOT a morning person and my absolute favourite thing to do in the morning was to wake up late and wait for someone to bring me a coffee. I would savour it before I finally got up when I absolutely had to. But during my research into SAD and how to prevent it I read about how important it is to get outside for the morning light within 30-60 mins of getting up.
And here I am, day five and wow does it make a huge difference! Those first breaths of fresh air when I unlock the back door are my favourite. I greet the garden and the birds, I peel back the wet cushion and sit down on the rattan chair surrounded by autumn leaves. The weather is cold but not unbearable yet but fear not, I have a dry robe on the way. I figured it would be perfect for my morning ritual since it’s waterproof on the outside and lined and cosy inside and easy to grab. I need simple rituals in order to keep them.
I am really making lots of positive changes in my life right now across the board. I deactivated my Instagram and Facebook altogether, that was a big one for me about 3 weeks ago. The first week was horrid, I couldn’t concentrate on anything, it all seemed so boring in comparison. But slowly my attention improved and I’ve read lots of books on my kindle since. I downloaded Youtube to still follow someone I missed but within 2 weeks I discovered Youtube shorts and I was sucked into scrolling again!!! How easily do these short videos suck you in is quite mind blowing. So I had to get rid of that too.
On one hand I think I am never reactivating those accounts again because I feel so much better off without it but on the other hand I am still picking up my phone a 93 times a day but this time there is nothing to scroll. So I go on BBC News a lot and have even started to go on Reddit a bit which I never did before! It goes to show I have a long way to go with my phone addiction and social media was just a small part of it.
Another thing I have improved on recently is not eating bread and I make sure I am going to bed partially hungry and I am naturally losing weight as a result. On Tuesday I ended up having a little bit of a baguette and it felt like someone jammed rising dough in my stomach. I used to eat baguettes several times a week but I guess when you eat these things all the time your discomfort becomes your normal and you don’t realise you shouldn’t be eating them. The same goes for going to bed on a full stomach, I didn’t realise how much better I would sleep without being full. And you are probably thinking I should know these things and I do but there is one thing knowing something and another implementing it and reaping the benefits.
There have been loads more changes but I will save those for another day. Tomorrow may be colder yet, but the birds will sing, and I’ll be there - coffee in hand, showing up for myself.
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